Pet names (and their effective usage)

by RA Jr. on February 21, 2011

“Honey”

“Sweety”

“Baby”

You might be thinking at this very moment that we are coming on to you. Hard. And we are. But only because we can’t take our eyes off of your Armani Exchange tee shirt.

Just kidding.

But if we were to hit on you, Shura, Antosha, and Grisha- we would do it in your native tongue: Rush- lish (Russian + English – get it? get it???!). Why? Because you are most likely from Brooklyn- the land of broken hearts and more importantly, broken English.  (And you thought we wouldn’t remember meeting you at the Banya last Sunday just because you’re Grisha #3 in our phone book! The image of your chest hair has been burned into the side of our brains. Permanently.)

Watch us go:

Kroshka – literal translation: crumb. Used effectively: Kroshka, do you want to shake and bake with me later?

Moosya – literal translation: none; sounds like: moose. Used effectively: Moosya, what big antlers you have. Do you want to shake and bake with me later? You can be Kroshka moya.

Lapa – literal translation: paw. Used effectively: Lapa, want to go back to my place later? I can’t keep my paws off of you….

Kottik – literal translation: kitty. Used effectively: Kottik, my name is Lana, but my friends call me Poosya. Do you know what that means? We’re two pussies.. meowwwww. (Can I scratch at your pole later?)

Kozzachka – literal translation: little goat. Used effectively: They call me Kozzachka.. Kazyol if you’re nasty.

And one more for good times:


Karova – literal translation: cow. Effective usage: Um, no, there is no effective usage here. But should you choose to use this, here is how it can be done: Moosya, you can’t go to Brighton Beach in that bikini, you look like a giant karova. Moo.

So..

“Kroshka”

“Lapa”

“Kottik”

Doesn’t that feel sooo much better?

PS — what pet name will you use? Tell us below. Most creative wins a big hugeeeeeeeeee hug from us. And isn’t that worth it?

PPS — all images courtesy of Google images.

  • E P

    You stole Lapa from me!

    • Kroshka Tvoya

      there’s plenty lapa to go around!

  • Leahk

    hehehehe… you guys rock! although there are a few key petnames that were omitted, like…

    galubchik – literal translation: spicies of birds. Also, the proximity to ‘galuboy’ – slang for ‘gay’, makes this one a real winner…. usage: galubchik, you can’t leave the house sporting skinny jeans and a low cut shirt. Designer or not, you look galuboy.

  • Jonny Dangerously

    Sonsa – literal translation, sun. Effective use: Sonsa , I’m gonna make you rise tonight!

    Tsiplyonik – translation, chick. Effective usage: You can be my ride or die Tsiplyonik.

    Zaychik or Krolik – translation, bunny. Effective usage: Tonight I be the krolik, you be the zaychik. Tomorrow, a trip to the maternity ward.

  • Banna122

    Chudo or Chudovische …HA!

  • Lesyasn

    Riba or ribka means fish

  • Married to Odessit

    I might be late for this but I had to add what I call my hubby which is Lubya … Lubov …

  • Maychich

    Call me too Americanized, but I think I would puke if anyone ever called me any of these names. (also probably explains why I’m it married to a Russian :)

  • Maychich

    Call me too Americanized, but I think I would puke if anyone ever called me any of these names. (also probably explains why I’m it married to a Russian :)

  • Maychich

    Call me too Americanized, but I think I would puke if anyone ever called me any of these names. (also probably explains why I’m it married to a Russian :)

  • Mama

    Koziavka and Chuchelo

  • Hanna S.

    BOOBALA 

  • Giselle

    YOu forgot about Solnishka, zayka and lyubimaya. 

  • Kuzya…like in Domovenok Kuzya, cartoon creature.

  • Kat

    My fav one to try and explain to my husband is “ribochka” to which he always asks how a cold, smelly fish could possibly be a term of endearment.

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