You know you’re a Ruski Bro if…

by RA Jr. on July 13, 2011

…you’re this guy:

But if you’re NOT this guy, here are a few other tell tale signs:

1. Spiked hair. Hair gel = pizdets.
2. No hair? No problem! Bald is beautiful.
3. Prada shades… and shoes.
4. Babushka. She’s your one and only.
5. Double limo tints – on your Maxima 2000.
6. Actually, you’ve upgraded to a Benz.
7. You don’t travel without your beats. House music, kid.
8. Member of AA: Armani Exchange & Acqua Di Gio club.
9. School? Nah, it’s all about opening up your own business.
9 a. But if that fails, you can always become a computer programmer.
10. iPhone 5 (your brother’s cousin’s sister’s boyfriend knows a cousin whose brother has an in).
11. Did we mention techno? Blast that shit!
13. Parliaments.
14. Bally’s Total Fitness. Getting tired ripped.
15. Gonna make SO MUCH money bro!

Just look at that stack of bills you got from your parents earned!
  • Mshimanov

    6. Actually, you’ve upgraded to a leased Benz.

    Suggestion for a future list:  “Russian Restaurant” Top Ten Hits.

  • imnotalex

    9. School? Nah, it’s all about opening up your own
    business cell phone store.

    • Imnotalex

         
         
         
              Correction: 9. School? Nah, it’s all about opening up your own
             
                  business
             
              cell phone store.
         
         
         

      • Anonymous

        true :) 

  • Anonymous

    So…. did we miss anything? Share! 

  • SM

    This is exactly why we are so embarrassingly racist. Us and blacks are EXACTLY THE SAME, but small differences (skin color, dong length) drive us insane with hatred.

  • SOSATARA

    lol I actually know who the guy is in the photo.. whatever and not all the Russians open up businesses and become computer programmers/IT.. stereotype!

    • Anonymous

      True :) … but admittedly so, stereotypes are stereotypes usually because there is some truth to them (for better or for worse) 

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