…you’re this guy:
But if you’re NOT this guy, here are a few other tell tale signs:
1. Spiked hair. Hair gel = pizdets.
2. No hair? No problem! Bald is beautiful.
3. Prada shades… and shoes.
4. Babushka. She’s your one and only.
5. Double limo tints – on your Maxima 2000.
6. Actually, you’ve upgraded to a Benz.
7. You don’t travel without your beats. House music, kid.
8. Member of AA: Armani Exchange & Acqua Di Gio club.
9. School? Nah, it’s all about opening up your own business.
9 a. But if that fails, you can always become a computer programmer.
10. iPhone 5 (your brother’s cousin’s sister’s boyfriend knows a cousin whose brother has an in).
11. Did we mention techno? Blast that shit!
14. Bally’s Total Fitness. Getting
15. Gonna make SO MUCH money bro!
Just look at that stack of bills you
got from your parents earned!